Monday 30 September 2013

Way of the MILF - Losing Weight Tip # 3

From Sheila Hanlon's blog on women's history. 
Gertrude: My dear Jane, what on Earth is that 
bicycle suit for? Jane: Why to wear, of course. 
Gertrude: But you haven't got a bicycle. 
Jane: No, but I've got a sewing machine.
So-o-o we are all ready to go in our new bras. We are focussing on happy thoughts instead of which flavour crisps to snork down last thing at night. My next tip is Get On Your Bike.

Sunday 29 September 2013

Saturday 21 September 2013

Way of the MILF - Losing Weight Tip # 2

The Stone Foundation
'Kay, we are advancing well now in our new bras, I am hoping; eyes to the front? 'Kay then, let's move on. Step two to losing weight is, Be Happy. A lot of people think: 'Oh if I was slim and lissom, I would be happy.' They have got it the wrong way round.

Thursday 19 September 2013

How to Comment Like an Anonymouse

Anonymice making a song and dance
about things on Whatsit Galore.
I'm v. excited about this, chums. As you know, HP has been v. kind and helpful to me in regards to the wishy washy wiper water bottle and suchlike. However he is having trouble posting comments on here. Well, that is not good cuz HP is a friend indeed and I would like to see his li'l cheeky face popping in now and then. So I am delighted to write a post just for him, to tell him how to comment like an Anonymouse.


Monday 16 September 2013

Sunday 15 September 2013

The Subject Position of Masculinity is Not Easy to Maintain

From NZ Men - lifestyle mag.
Eh what? What did she say? Gah, she is being all Dr. Smith! Where is the MILFy flirting?

'Kay, yah. This blogpost is about being a man, and whether that is hard work and I suppose I do wonder, Why do men bother? And unfortunately, I think it's because it's What Women Want (to answer Freud's infamous question).

Wednesday 11 September 2013

Please Move That Vacuum From Your Thoughts to the Cleaner

BBC pic
For Swiss Toni, a car is like a beautiful woman.

Well, dahlinks, a vacuum cleaner is like a beautiful car being operated (usually) by a beautiful woman.

Lacklustre Lakhi

Pic © Piglet
Lakhi was poorly yesterday. I was surprised when she didn't appear at the bottom of the stairs as soon as I got up. The kitten came running for breakfast but not her. 

The Sex Kitten's Clever Strategy

From
Hot Games for Girls
(not that hot, LOL.) 
Once upon a time, I was a sex kitten 'n then I grew up (wink).

When I was a little kitten there was a day I needed a new coat so I thought of this strategy. (It was not long after I had gone up to university, 'n for the first time I was having to manage my money myself.)

Tuesday 10 September 2013

The Mobile MILF

From Wikipedia.
Well, dahlinks. As you know from reading about my titanic struggles with the wishy washy wiper water bottle, I do drive a black car. Black is the new black! (Although to tell the truth, it was not I who selected the black car but the Baron.) I feel at my most MILFy when driving the car, it is all very Stacey’s Mom and that (wink). I drive along playing The Rolling Stones. Yah, Mother’s Little Helper and Beast of Burden (wink).

Friday 6 September 2013

Sickeningly Sweet Kitten Pix

The kitten has been helping out around the house. (She's not as good as the cubs. Doesn't have the buns to shake.) 

Here she is with Lakhi - as I type, they are running round the house after each other, leaping over the armchairs and bosting each other about in a manner which is pretty impressive for a cat who was recently operated on. 

Thursday 5 September 2013

MILF French Toast

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The Baron's Lunch is Sent Packing

Packed lunches.
From post on my Anth Mum blog
'Kay yah, there was a time I used to always make the Baron a packed lunch. 'N my friends on and off line were all like, "WTF! You are up to your eyeballs in cooking breakfast, hanging out the laundry, getting Piglet dressed and her dinner money counted out. You do not need to be making a sandwich every day as well! Tell him to do it himself."

Yah, yah, that is very rational and sensible. Totally Enlightenment. And of course the reasons I was making the packed lunch were totally MILFy and nonsense. But the reason I gave it up in the end was not because I did not really have time. I am a Noodle Mom. I will cook food for anyone who wants it as long as there are hours in the day.

Wednesday 4 September 2013

Latest on the Litter Prevention Programme

Whore and Child. (Oh, and laundry.) 
Yes, it's all fine! Lakhi has recovered well from her operation. She is being good and not chewing her stitches so she doesn't need to wear one of those unattractive plastic hood things.

The Baron at Feeding Time

From Science Codex
Men like the Baron are amazing. They should be the topic of a proper scientific study.


Back to Normal Chez MILF

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Tuesday 3 September 2013

The Catalian Job

I acksherly was hoping to
throw out that chair and
make some space before
the cats adopted it, grrr. 
OK, major military exercise in hand. The Whore of Catylon is going in for her Operation today. 

This means she has been allowed NO food since 8 pm last night. You can only imagine the tortures experienced by a Noodle Mom forbidden to feed some hungry being. "It is for your own good! (sniff)" 

Our new kitten is going in too, to be immunised. They get on very nicely together. When there were four rambunctious kittens, Lakhi often lay about at a higher level watching them in a weary way. Now there is just the one, she has remembered she is a young feisty feline and she hides behind the armchairs then leaps out on Eowyn, who springs up in the air with all her fluffy kitten fur standing up on end. 


The Master and the Slave - MILF version

Demotivational poster
LOL, don't get too excited! We are not doing 50 Shades of Badly Written Dom/sub stuff in here.


Monday 2 September 2013